Friday, July 31, 2009
Thursday, July 30, 2009
A quick introduction ... I am a CA from Chennai and was Pallavi's colleague and friend in Citibank. I resigned my job when I got married so that I can help hubby in his private practice (he's a lawyer) and also devote more time to home.
Pregnancy so far: I had a horrible first trimester with so much vomiting and nausea that I could barely get up from bed. To top that all, I had mild bleeding which made my doc give me strict instruction not to even get up from bed till month five (I wasn't even allowed to walk around inside the house). I've just begun feeling like myself again in the last one month. But looks like my happiness is bound to be short-lived. I came down with high fever and joint/body pain 4 days ago. Fever is showing no signs of going away (hitting 102 to 103 degrees). Am popping in paracetamol tablets (which only brings the fever down by a couple of degrees and then shoots back up in an hour or so) and waiting for my blood and urine reports to come in. I read somewhere that fever higher than 102 degrees can harm the baby, so I've been worried sick. If anyone has any tips on controlling fever, will be glad to try!!
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
The pregnancy: I had a roller coaster pregnancy thanks to PCOS making trimester 1 riskier than normal, compounded by some blips on the ultrasound including a low placenta that made my doc put me on house arrest for 2 months (aarrgh!) and our annual holiday to Goa was cancelled. On the up-side, i had not 1 minute of morning sickness/nausea and the house arrest meant I caught up on a ton of reading. Trimester 2 and the anomaly scans etc. were all good, placenta moved up - so I was allowed to workout again and get about town for movies and shopping and dinners out. Then came Trimester 3 and the warning that I was at risk of having a premie cos of family history. So again outings were down and all holidays cancelled. A final 'just for fun' scan in week 37 ended up showing some possible problem for the baby which required a paed. cardiologist to be present at the birth. Thankfully Mihika chose to arrive in week 38/39 cusp so we didn't have long to worry!
Early stages: I was staying at my docs place in Pune (yes, you read that right - my doc was also my mum's own sister) - with the hospital a short 5 minute drive away. Srikanth was with us for the weekend since it was our 5th anniversary as was my mum who had arrived with me a few weeks earlier. Sri was due to head back to Mumbai(where we live)Monday morning but that's when I had my first contraction at the breakfast table!
My aunt walked over and checked to see they were the 'real' thing, and I could tell these were different from the random tightening that the Braxton-Hicks I'd had the week before were. We fished out the timer and discovered the contractions were 30 seconds or so every 30 minutes to an hour. I decided to sit down to a normal day of work and it was only by evening that I finally began to have to use my lamaze breathing techniques. By late evening things got a little stronger and I felt the need to head for a walk at 9.30pm to take my mind off them. When Srikanth and I came upstairs, we found mum and aunt all dressed up and ready to head to hospital! But i'd decided not to check into hospital at night 'cause i felt it would just be one long night - i wanted to sleep in a nice home bed, have a nice homey breakfast and THEN go to the hospital. I had a decent night's sleep though stronger contractions woke me up every 20 minutes at night. I later discovered my aunt and mum hadn't slept much at all!!!
Off we go : At 9am the next day I had a warm shower, a light breakfast of semia upma and a bowl of melon and said 'Now, let's go to the hospital.' :) Sent a mail to work folks saying i was off to have my baby and headed to the car with contractions now every 15 minutes lasting about 30 seconds. Took my well stocked 'hospital bag' that had been carefully packed with a stack of magazines, an ipod, chewing gum, fruit juice packs and chocolate plus my trusty sipper, some socks and a shawl. (I ended up not having any time for the books, mags or ipod!)
The check-up: When we reached the hospital and checked into the maternity suite at Apollo Jehangir by 9.30am - I was thrilled to see it was an LDR so that meant no shuttling around from labor ward to delivery room etc. Wore my robes, junior docs checked me(this means they strap on a fetal heart monitor and a contraction monitor which gives an ECG like output), my aunt did a quick internal check(this was like a pap smear/TVS but easier since there are no gadgets/tools involved, just a gloved doctor!) and found I was 3 cm dilated and said 'still lots of time - contractions are not that strong' (i was like Oh! Hope my lamaze breathing helps when it gets strong cos this felt strong enough!!). They prepped me with an enema and I asked for the epidural to be fitted though no dose would be given till later(just so i wouldn't flinch and have it go the wrong way). It was now 10am.
The wait: At 11am I was given an IV and a test dose to check for allergies with the epidural. All well but since it was a mild dose I felt every contraction. My drip was 'enhanced' with pitocin to speed things up. In about 10 minutes the contractions got really strong and came 10 minutes apart lasting 30 seconds to 45 seconds. The hospital catering folks dropped by with hot soup and lunch. (I skipped the lunch, had the soup). At noon they decided to do an ARM(membrane rupture since my waters hadn't broken). This felt like a little pressure and the doc did this manually - painless, again internally. My aunt then left on her rounds. By 1pm I felt my breathing wasn't gonna get me through the next phase so asked for my epidural dose. Junior docs wanted to wait for my aunt. So I groaned and moaned(learnt in lamaze that the hee and hoo breathing won't help if pains are strong and painful, and that this would be better. Sri held my hand through it all and reminded me to keep breathing) my way through till 1.30 when she arrived - apparently I was rather quiet cos a doc came to check if I was asleep or sniffling cos it was so silent! She checked me and found I was already past transition - the toughest phase and almost 9cm along!! She did give an ok for the epidural which was administered at 2.15 or so. Unfortunately for me, everything in the labor stage was over by 2.30 which is when the epidural pain relief kicked in! So much for that.
Mihika arrives: At 2.30 my aunt did another check and said the baby was almost at the birth station, but that she would not get me to push till the baby crowned since I had just had an epidural and may not feel like pushing(ladies if the baby is doing fine and you're on an epi, please please tell our docs you want to wait to push, it is SO much easier). Again, lamaze lessons kicked in! We'd been taught to maximise the phase between labor and pushing to rest and recoup. So I planned to take a 20 minute nap and Srikanth brought me one of our orange juice packs which I glugged down in 30 seconds! By this time i had the shivers so put on my socks and shawl to catch some zzzz's. At 3pm the docs arrived again(and sometime in between gave me an episiotomy) with nurses in tow and had me set up in a stirrup type position to push. Everyone in the room cheered like a squad in unison, 'Come on Pallavi' and suddenly I felt the need to push! Everyone cheered like crazy saying you're nearly there - which I thought was a load of bunkum, intended to motivate a pooped woman in labor(friends told me they pushed for 30 mins to 2 hours) - it was only 3.03pm. So the next time I pushed again and suddenly my aunt says 'Nearly there, once more', so I hold my breath and push again. "waaaaaahh waaaahhh" . What? Already? I check the clock its been just 3 to 5 minutes since we started!!! The baby arrived at 3.05pm with no fuss and a wild yell! A slippery lil thing who was given to me to say Hi to...we were so surprised she was already there, but happy as hell! Srikanth was the proud dad to a darling baby girl...thankfully our nickname for our baby-to-be was ok (we had referred to the baby as Olive. didn't have a clue if it was gonna be a girl or a boy. Imagine a poor boy called Olive!)!
They took her away to the next room for the cardiologist and neonatologist to check her while I got my episiotomy stitched up/placenta delivered, she got good APGARs and we were happy. She came back to us all bundled up and looked us straight in the eye when we held her. We melted. Mihika was here.
PS: She was later found to be absolutely fine and healthy, so no worries on that count. Touchwood.
PPS: After the birth, we hung around the same room where they gave me some pain killers and brought me hot grilled sandwiches and tea while I was under routine observation post delivery. I shifted to my room an hour later.
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
You all must be wondering why we were sending all those test posts out to mommy center. Thanks to Ramya our tech admin, we have now a subscription feature on our Mommy Center blog page. Now some of us have already been getting email notifications when something is posted and some of you weren't. The reason why some of you didn't was because we could only have 10 people who could be notified by emails of all the updates in the blog.
Now with the new subscription service , we all can get emails when someone posts something on the blog. So here is what YOU ALL SHOULD DO!
1. Scroll all the way down to the bottom of the blog page and you will see " Subscribe to mommy center". All you do is enter your email address in the text box and click the "Subscribe" button. The process isn't over yet.
2. You will come to a page called the Feedburner Email Subscription page and you have to complete the subscription process by typing in whatever word you see there and then click the "Complete Subscription Request" button.
3. Once you have done this, you should get a confirmation email in your inbox from Feedburner asking you to activate your subscription. Just follow the instructions and you should be good to go!!
Now... how this is set up is that the emails of any updates from the blog will be sent between 11 am -1 am EST which is 8:30 pm - 10:30 pm IST (Singapore bloggers not sure about the time there :D). So if anyone writes a post after that, you will not get an immediate email notification of your post, but you should get it between the times mentioned above. But don't let that stop you from blogging :) ! It is just that , it will come to your inbox late.
So ladies make sure ALL of you (that means those of you who still do get emails ) subscribe to mommy center. If you could comment saying that you subscribed, that would be good so that we know who all subscribed and make sure everyone is getting the emails from Mommy Center.
Thank you all for keeping this blog alive!!
Why is there a sudden lull on the blog? Yes, there is some work going on .. but that does not stop you from writing up. Come on and get those posts flowing in. It will only further help us with getting the email notifications thingie working.
Get Blogging. Now!
Monday, July 27, 2009
Divya, Mommy Center extends a warm welcome to you! Hmm.. Due in December? Nice. You must be so excited!! Fill us in about your journey through life and what it feels like being at the stage you are in. Do you have cravings? What about nausea? You must be oh-so-done with it by now we hope, since you seem to have completed your first trimester. How is it managing home and work as of now? Do you have help at home? Write to us and share your thoughts.. and we "experienced" moms will be more than happy to give you words of wisdom :)
If you seem to want instructions on how to post articles, click here. And if you want to know more about Mommy Center, this is it. And if you are wondering what sort of a header we have...here is some info about that!
And before I forget, I am Deepti Pawar (Pallavi's college mate, obviously) and here is a little something about my life after we graduated until date. A few other ex-college moms who are already on-board have written in too. Check out their posts in the archives section of this blog.
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Friday, July 24, 2009
Hey everyone, Neha Srivastava is my neighbor. We've known each other since late 2007. Yup, its not too long, but read on and you will agree that it does feel like ages!
The first time we met was at the doorsteps of Neha's apartment when they were moving in just two weeks after we moved into ours. And I could not help but notice the one thing we both had in common - bulging bellies. She was due that December 07 and me in January 08. How's that for starting a good friendship? And since then there has been no stopping. Neha's darling son, Darsh, is now 19 months old (one month elder to Samvit, as I mentioned earlier) and the two kids meet everyday for a daily dose of playtime. And, we both share lot more than just mommy talk.... good food, beauty parlor talks etc. to name a few. Who can ask for a better neighbor!?
Neha, here is welcoming you to Mommy Center!!
Announcing our Technical Administrator
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Barkha Bordia (Mumbai)
Bhoomika Annaiah (Bangalore) - She mailed me asking for the invite recently
Komal Shah (Bangalore)
Pallavi Rao (Bangalore/Mumbai)
Prianca Aswal (Noida)
Smitha Rao Madan (Bangalore)
Sohini Sengupta (Bangalore)
Trisha Sandill (Bangalore)
Anitha P B
Now that the list is up, let's get the admins in place. I think we need two for India and USA respectively. Singapore can have one admin.
Firstly, we are growing. We started off with about a handful of us and now we are about 20 of us who have either been regular authors, readers or yet to accept invites (that's the new joinees). Now, that is a huge number! Unfortunately blogger's notification settings does not allow me to allow more than 10 people to whom an email will be sent each time a post is written by an author. So, with so many of us I am having a hard time getting everyone up and reading/writing.
Here is what I thought to solve this issue. We create a Google Group for Mommy Center authors and I add just that group id. But, Im thinking that will only complicate things further. Because I have already been asked by a couple of you about how you can get blog related stuff to your inbox. But, here is the catch. If you want everything to come to your inbox, why have this blog at all?? Right? The whole point is to check it regulary and share your stuff!
Well still the issue is not solved. Because with our hectic lives, checking mail itself is an ardous task, let alone going beyond that. So email notification is a great thing! And, so I will work to that end.
That apart, I wanted to know if any of you out there is a part of any other blog (with many people on it, like Mommy center) where you get email notifications. And if so then can you check with the admin and let me know how its done. You see, so much for my techy skills and BSc Comp. Sc.!!! Well, I know 'tis really a matter of getting some time and RnD, which sadly is tough with a kiddo. So I will gladly accept any help and more administrators!!!
If you still have doubts, don't hesitate to contact ANY of us on the blog. And all you need to do for this is either just write it up as a comment to this post OR simply email me and I will try my best to clarify things.
Welcome aboard!! And we cannot wait to hear from you all....
Happy Blogging Mommies!!
I'd like to introduce 4 lovely ladies to the group...none of them know each other though!
Arathi - Arathi is a mom-to-be due in this October and is hoping to get lots of tips from those of us who have a headstart...hope we get more moms-to-be signing on soon so we have lots on that equally exciting phase! Arathi is an ex-colleague from Citi and a pal always. She lives in Chennai and is a CA.
Gayathri - I went to school with her at Chennai. Gayathri now works as an architect in the US and has a lovely lil girl Anoushka who is about a yr and a half.
Padma(since we have another Padma maybe you're ok with being called Paddy as i know you?) - We are friends from Bangalore, attended B school coaching classes together and she lived in the same colony I did. Padma is now the proud mommy of handsome Varun and is based in the US.
Lekshmi - My hubby's pal from architecture college, I got to meet Lekshmi a few years back. She now lives in Mumbai, like Gayathri is an architect and has an enthu lil girl who is all of 5 years old - Malini.
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Our husbands got acquainted in Singapore as they were housemates. She was the first lady I met when I landed in Uniquely Singapore after my wedding… Our meeting was as usual in a restaurant, where we had gathered to welcome, Anushka (then 6 months old) to Singapore after her birth in India, and more I must say to meet up with friends.
Now she is the best friend I can ask for and more. We chat throughout the day… no not on the computer… but on phone about anything and everything!!!!… there are days when we have talked for more than 2 hours at a go… and yes… we can do all the household chores with perfection while on phone… that is the phone is between our shoulder and ear and thus our hands are free to do everything…
Welcome, Padma and have a wonderful blogging time. Do share your experiences (mother of 2) with all of us.
I hereby request those of you who would like to take up administrator rights to email me or simply post comments to this post saying you would like to do so. I need to do a little research on how many administrators are allowed on a blog. But, for now what I thought was we could have one admin for each region in the world (Two for regions that have many members). Well, its just my thought. It need not be the "rule".
So, as it stands we could have 2 admins in the US, 2 in India and 1 for Far East countries. We're global! WoW!
Does this plan seem okay? Like I said , its just a thought....if you all agree then we do this. But you think you have better ideas then PLEASE put them forth and we will all consider it and decide what works best for OUR BABY - Mommy Center!!!
OKAY! Let me come to the point. We have two (yes TWO) new members joining in. Thanks to Pallavi and Anitha for introducing Barkha Bordia and Padma Alur respectively. I request the new joinees to kindly accept the invitation and read the instructions on how to post articles on the blog.
We at Mommy Center also invite Barkha and Padma to read up on our stories in the archives of the blog. Oh, and not to mention would love to hear about you too! Do write in and let's get the mommy-talk (and just about any other talk) going!!
Barkha is a CA-MBA and rejoins the workforce with her old company at their India office...she's now also someone I turn to for tips and stories on 'what to expect' :)
Well Singapore being a food haven, and me being a food lover we could not resist to eat all that was out there. We started taking Shreyas out to restaurants from when he was very young ...may be couple of months old... He was too young to understand or react to anything out there. And those days he would sleep in his pram or just play with his rattles etc; Gradually he got used to the restaurants and would sit in his high chair...without fuss or tantrums...this does not rule out that we didn’t have bad restaurant out days...but he got used to it and now he enjoys all the different kind of food we try…
Another topic would be should we take them to theatres… L READ ON
My hubby being the person he is a scientist would watch at the least one movie in theatres every week. This was ok with me before Shreyas was born and there were days when we would be on a movie marathon!! You wouldn’t believe it if that we watched 3 movies at a stretch on a weekend and return home by walk on an expressway at 330 AM!!!! ( Singapore is a safe place in these ways).
When Shreyas was born, he insisted that we take him to theatres. Pooh!! Can’t recall how many arguments we had about this and eventually my hubby won. We would take Shreyas to movies along with us though not every week as before (he had me to face). To deal with a movie fanatic husband is one thing and managing a small infant in the theatres in another. You wouldn’t believe this if I tell you that I would breast feed Shreyas in the theatres (definitely we would choose the corner seats), feed him food and he would even nap in the theatres for the entire length of the movie. He would sleep because when I would make him sleep at home I would not close all the doors and windows as usually we do, but would leave the TV or music on and he eventually got used to sleeping in noise. So he could actually sleep in the theatres. Coming to think of it now, it was really an adventure. hahah (I can c many of your frowning faces and do I hear gasps...)
Now that he is 3.4 years old. He sits in the theatre and completely enjoys all the movies we take him to...definitely G and PG movies else they wouldn’t allow him inside the theatre. We also enjoy live shows such as Barney, Mickey Mouse on ICE... all this as a result of him getting used to people and the noise. Recently we watched ICEAGE 3 and other animated releases. Not forgetting to mention the latest Harry potter flick… ;-)
So I think that its just matter of them getting used to a place or setting...
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Two years back on July 18th, we were blessed with little Jaiden.I dont know how time went by but somehow it did. Motherhood is a roller coaster ride ..but when you think about it, there are beautiful moments. When they grow older, you grow with them and when birthday comes..you become emmotional because they are a year older.
Well just like his first birthday, this birthday was special to me. I was excited about making him a cake because he cannot eat the ones we usually get. My hunt for a cake recipe started about a month and a half back. I also wanted to make it more special by having his favorite character drawn on the cake. So I got ideas from the web and did a lot of research on how to get that done. I finally got one recipe and would like to share it with you. Pallavi also suggested I put it up here so that anyone can try to make it if they have kids like jaiden. It isn't a fancy recipe but this recipe doesnt have any eggs or butter in it. If there are any kids who are allergic or have friends whose kids are allergic, they can use this recipe. Very simple ingredients, very simple recipe.
It is called Vegan Vanilla Cake and the link to the recipe is http://www.ehow.com/how_5051889_make-vegan-vanilla-cake.html
I used the recipe below for the icing.
1/2 cup shortening
1/2 cup margarine
4 cups sugar
2 tablespoon soy milk
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
This is the basic recipe and I did the icing according these measurements for the cake measurements and I got left overs for the icing. So there you go ladies.. if you want to try something new... try a hand at this!
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Thank you Komal and thank you Deepti, for inviting me to be a part of the blog! And to begin with, may I please apologize for taking so long to accept...baby, husband, in laws, MAIDS...all responsible for my bad manners! :)
The world of internet can never cease to surprise me! Komal and I are like the thickest of pals today and share our entire day with each other and...and...we haven't met EVER! This takes me back to one of the many books I read by Dr Brian Weise where he says that people who are destined to meet always will and they may have never known each other but will feel a positive vibe getting them together! :) But of course, lets not forget the REAL heroes (and heroines) who're responsible for our friendship and thus me being a part of this blog...our little darlings!!!
Well...a few years back, I would've never even thought that life could get to be such a rolleroaster ride but today, I'm a mommy through and through and my life revolves around nothing but my little brat, who, surprisingly, is asleep right now and that's the reason I have been able to finally get onto the blog...........and here comes the maid! Phew! And there begins my day!!!!!!! Oh well, lots more to share but it'll just have to wait till I'm free (I'm hoping that'll happen atleast the day my brat gets married, if not before!)
Oops! By the way, my son's name is not brat...It Shaurya Singh Aswal. I had pretty much set my heart on Randeep or Ranveer (the rajput in me!) but the moment my husband and I lay our eyes on him, it just HAD to be Shaurya!
God bless and stay good!
As much as I hate to see charts about when every kid should do what, it sometimes is a good thing to atleast know what they are capable of doing at each stage so it will help us to keep them motivated. I found this interesting link that lays out information about various milestones (which seem not too unreal, thankfully) for babies aged 0-months to children aged 5 years.
Hope its helpful!
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Yes, Samvit is 1.5 years now and he still does not walk. So? Is it in my hands? Do I have a wand that can make him walk? It's not like he does not do it. He is PLAIN SCARED! He holds my or his dad's finger tightly and will not let go .. although he is walking on his own without really tugging on to us and applying any pressure. So, he is bearing his entire weight and walking... but wont let go. The moment we leave him, he simply collapses on his knees and screams out in anger that we left him.
I mean its one thing about achieving milestones but totally another for every child to get to the same milestone at the same time. I fail to give more explanations to onlookers and people who give their "suggestions" that I AM doing ALL I can. I try to make him walk by holding him.. he walks... but he is scared to let go!! How can I take that fear out? It should come from him. So when people ask me I say "You can take a horse to the water, but cannot make it drink"!!!
Did any of you face this kind of thing? I'm getting frustrated with every passing day to the extent that I want to yank Samvit onto his feet, cast a spell and get him walking!
Monday, July 13, 2009
Being married in the same town my parents live is a blessing. More so since my in-laws dont live in the same city or country for that matter. So my family is our only support group. Kyra spends her dad at my mom's place while I am at work. There are loads of help out there to look after her, plus my bhabhi stays at home, as she just gave birth to her second child. She has an elder brother to plat with over there. A Blessing most of you if not all would agree to.
Weekends are my chores day and the very rare dinner out with family/friends. On such cases I do not like to take Kyra out, as her sleep gets disturbed. I believe that children grow in their sleep so why ruin that. I must add that Kyra is a very light sleeper (thanks to my genes) and picking her up from the bed or someone talking loudly. So its best I thought she stays at home. Besides I am very confident that she is very well cared of when I am not around and not need to worry about anything. Kyra is too small to understand the concept of a resturant as yet and associates no pleasure with it. Thereby I am not depriving her of anything is my faith.
Though alot of people, mainly cause they would like to see her keep telling me how they took their kids to even a movie from the age of 4 m.
I am wrong in putting Kyra's sleep and her hapiness (as perceived by me) as priority number one, over taking her to resturants for my friends pleasure?
Friday, July 10, 2009
Yes, I understand what you are going through. It can be a real debate (and works more on our mental level than anything else) - This whole issue about taking out time for ourselves without feeling guilty. But at the end of the day I think that its what we want most that will get its priority.
I am a workout freak (altho I have to still loose weight) and find it hopelessly hard to find time to workout even though I am at home. I guess its when you are home that you tend to have more work to do than when at work. Besides, like you all know by now...here is the US we ladies are everything from wife, mom, kaamwaali bai, dhobi, baawarchi, driver etc. to name few. But I am not complaining. We are the backbones of every family. But, that is where the whole issue starts. We handle so many things (plus office work) and baby care... sometimes its simply more than we can chew. And I think its not unfair to take a break and do what you want. But then this whole guilt thingie rises at the back of our heads and we just apply the brakes.
I honestly would love to workout at the gym and then practice playing my keyboard and painting. But when I get doing to doing it I think Im not being with Samvit..and then I feel like the worst Mom on planet earth.
Anyway, putting all emotions apart (which is so tough after becoming a Mom) I think it all boils down to time management. Komal, how about you going to the gym for say 3 days a week for now, so that the other days you can be with Kyra at home. So you will be splitting your time between what you want and what you ...umm... want!! :)
I guess motherhood is all about balancing things out and finding win win situations for everyone involved in our lives. Hmm.. and the game has just begun!!!
This is something I think of everyday and when I do get a little bit of "me" time.. it is just not enough. I remember the times when I used to spend 45 minutes taking a shower. Now even if I try to I can't go beyond 20 minutes. I still remember, last year I had gone out for lunch with my sister, leaving Binoy and Jaiden here and I couldnt simply relax at the restuarant. I couldn't enjoy the moment that we were spending. It was like I had to get back home to do something else. It is like I dont know how to enjoy or relax anymore, but still want to!
When Jaiden is awake.. I am either feeding him, or trying to cook, or clean or doing something with him or looking for jobs. When he is asleep, I try to again look for jobs, do some cooking or cleaning. Even if I try to sit down to watch a movie.. I keep thinking 'when is he going to get up...he probably will be up in a while'.
Looking for a job is very hard and with this 2 year break things are very bad at my end and so sometime soon I will have to fit in a time for learning something. The very idea of me starting that haunts me because I have enough on my plate.
How and what do you guys do for "me time"? Do you feel the same way too??!
Beginning at the beginning, have a cousins wedding coming up in Nov plus we have a trip scheduled to my sasural (bangkok) in December. The wedding in nov, is the first wedding in the family that i would be attending post my marriage. There have been weddings in between, but for some reason or the other I have not been able to attend them. So heres my chance to justify some of the expenditure on clothes made during my wedding. Have not visited my sasural in over 2.5 years now - naver felt the need as my in-laws would come visit us. Plus this would be the first time Kyra would be going there, and if I know my in-laws I am sure they would be throwing a party for her. Plently of occasions for me to look great and feel great coming my way! Thankfully I have lots most of my pregnancy weight, but I am left with a well rounded ab region....makes me look about 4/5 months pregnant even now! :( The desire to have washboard abs has been with me for as long as I can remember....though no action till date has been done towards that front. Recently I came across a blog (cant remember the name) which only talks about the authors progress towards being bikini ready by 30. Thats when the whole flame rekindled and I wanted to look fit and good in the upcoming festivities.
You must be wondering whats this long story got to do with the mommy-center blog or with the title? Well I just couldnt fit in the gym into my schedule. Not that there was not enough time for it....I mean I am willing to cut corners with some other things for the next 3 months to be able to go to the gym but there were other factors - which part of bangalore (my house and office are in two different areas of bangalore), where would Kyra be, how will I cook dinner (cause I figured the only time I could fit the gym would be post work in the evening), Kyra's food and loads of other things. I am still currently working on finding answers to all those questions but over an above that is a thought....
I work through the day. Kyra drives with me around town for about 1.5 hrs a day. When we get home, I am busy with preparing dinner and other house hold duties. By the time I am done with everything its Kyra's bed time. Sometimes feel bad that I do not get to spend enough time with Kyra, but not working is not an option for me - both financially and mentally. Taking out time for the gym would mean a futher reduction in Kyra and my bonding time. Should I or shouldn't????
A friend of mine was mentioned that the american's went over board with the whole spending thing, but that apart there is alot to learn from them. Europe US, NZ (those are the places I am aware of ) plan their day such that they very clearly demark their family time from office time. They even set aside a budget for travelling and vacations. Something most asians would consider least priority. We are all so tunned to saving and securing our children's future that we forget to enjoy the moment. Postponing a joy is very common, in everything - be it a new dress (save it for an occasion) or a even as small as eating at a fav resturant (too tired today, will go there tmr).
I am not saying we should look at our wishes overlooking our children's wants and desires. I am just saying that is it right or selfish to try and do something for one's happiness. It could be taking a music class or dancing or writing a book or just about anything that gives one happiness, but sacrificing maybe time or money or some other resource for your child?
Let me know what you guys think.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Of course, there were a lot of times when the pressure would be in a different direction altogether. Trying to look good, having the hippest of accessories, being groomed well at all times (umpteen parlor visits hehe) to name a few. It was all a part of the rat race. And, it was normal.
But suddenly, these days I find myself in a spot dealing with a whole new dimension of life's little pressures. If you have not guessed it yet - Parenting!!! I think Ive never questioned myself so many times about anything else as much as I have about how good or bad a Mom I am.
When I see other mothers of kids Samvit's age putting so much effort towards teaching them things I begin to wonder if I'm doing enough. And everytime I ask myself that question it stings like a thousand bees. One kid already eats with a spoon - Samvit does not. Another one already says a few numbers and "reads" books - Samvit does not. And, another one helps his Mom with small chores - Boo hoo, Samvit does not. So who is to blame? Me. Me. Me!!! And so I bought a spoon, and repeatedly say numbers and thrust laundry clothes and dirty dishes into my little boy's hand and tell him do this and say that.... LORD!
I don't think I had a single book at the age of 1.5 years. I probably did not even know what a spoon was although I may have seen it, nor did I know that something called numbers existed. But, someday along the way I did get to know it all. Sometimes I think its just best to let them explore things and learn on their own at this stage. They anyway have a whole lifetime for this... but when I see other Mom's doing all this I feel like a pressure cooker about to burst!!!
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
So he doesnt get to eat chocolate or ice creams or sweets or cakes or cookies or anything that has ghee or butter. We constantly have to keep looking at the ingredients list to make sure it is safe to give him. The reason is , if he accidently takes in any of these products, he could get an anaphylactic reaction which could be fatal if not taken care of immediately. Even if he touches milk, he starts to itch and his face would turn red with a rash. So that means if we had to eat icecream or have tea.. we would have to wash our mouths and hands before we touch him or kiss him. Going out to eat is also hard for us because 90% of the time he cannot have anything.
Luckily, he can have everything else. Which means I can cook veggies and non-veg without adding any yogurt or milk or any of the nuts and feed him that. So that way we have adjusted to his allergies and now having to look at the ingredients or asking at a restuarant what they have in the dish is a normal thing. As for milk we give him soy milk. The joy of having SOY!!
I am happy that he eats whatever I make, even though it takes a couple of trials, and one good thing is.. he cannot eat a lot of the junk(phew)!! There are things that I dont like a lot but do make for him because he looses on a lot of the milk and eggs. We dont get a lot of indian veggies here.. so i end up cooking brocoli and asparagus(which i hate) for him. When we do get indian veggies... he loves them. Fruits is one thing he loves. One sad thing is he cannot eat mangoes! Again we found that his face gets a rash when he eats mangoes. But bananas, melons, grapes, oranges.. he loves.
It is good to make for our kids the things we dont like to see if they would eat it. But I think as time goes by.. we just dont buy those things and eventually they too wont eat it not because they dont like it but just because they dont have the habit of eating it. Eventually i think they will explore as they grow older, learn to like some foods, hate some and just wont know how some tastes until they try a good recipe. But yeah, giving them the option to like it or hate it is definitely a good idea.
Thank God for Soy and Soy ice cream!!
Had come across this interesting debate today. Wherein vegetarian parents (vegetarian by choice, not by religion/customs) feeds their child meat. of course for most vegetarian Indian (including me) non-veg is a strict no-no for various reasons. The point of discussion is not those foods, but those other things that one does not like but is super healthy. The logic being that give the child the chance to choose what he/she likes/dislikes.
I do not like bhindi or brijal or paneer (yes i am a veg non paneer eater) and have only seen my mom prepare them, have never tried making them on my own either, and in some cases (paneer) have never seen my mom cook them either. Though it is too early to introduce some of these into Kyra's diet. I do not like Mango's but Kyra did eat a small piece. Its easy to camoflage some things and still fed the baby. My husband does not like spinach (for a very wierd reason) but Kyra has palak every day as part of her soup. I do not like urad dal - but its part of the many grains that make up her dinner. Some others aint that easy. What happens to things like pumpkin (dont know if its healthy or not) both of us cant stand that fruit. Assuming its a very import part of Kyra's diet, would we be able to feed her that?
Was wondering what happens if you really dislike a particularly healthy fruit or vegetables or grains that you know would be a valuable menu addition for baby (avocado, for example)? Do you pretend to like it, to encourage your baby to eat? Do you serve it JUST to the baby? Would you learn how to prepare it and then prepare it just for the baby?
The discussion is only for healthy food, needless to say that mother's restriction as far as junk food is still required and a must.
The idea is to introduce an array of flavours and letting the child make an independent choice. Have any of you given your child something that you have not eaten yourself or cant even bare the sight of?
Saturday, July 4, 2009
well i would like to share this funny thing that happened in one of my teaching sessions with my daughter.
Few months back whenNainika started to utter few simple words she started with ammam( when she needs to ask me for water) and other meaningless words .So one fine day i decided to teach her calling me "mamma" and guess what she started saying "papa" all by herself...initially i was pissed thinking she doesn't want to learn calling me mamma but prefers to call her dad as papa first..
But that didn't stop me... i was adamant on teaching her mamma first, but my daughter is also equally stubborn.. As many times as i was uttering the word mamma,she repeated that many times with papa itself. alas i was tired and thought that if now i teach her saying papa may be she will say mamma at least for once and make me feel happy but No, To put all my efforts to waste she again said papa and started giggling loudly..
when i narrated this incident to my hubby. obviously he was very thrilled and told me that she prefers her dad over me ... And anyways this shows that babies take their own time to learn and of course choice too.. no matter how hard we try to teach them what we want.
Friday, July 3, 2009
Of course, most of us end up with bigger hips, softer tummies et. al. Some of us are even spared this and get washboard abs in a couple of weeks after delivery. All that is in the game. But hair? Okay, its not as gross as it sounds - But it sure is WEIRD!!!
All through my pregnancy I had long, lustrous, luxurious tresses to say the least. Something that I had not enjoyed anytime in my life. Well ya it was the hormones doing that. But I was overjoyed when it stayed that way well into a 2-3 months post delivery. Then it began falling. Yes, that is normal too. I know. I lost a LOT of hair for about 2 months. So much that I began looking nearly bald around my forehead and temples and just about all around my hairline (even at the back).
Then some friends noticed that and suggested I see a dermatologist. Blah! I could care less. I had enough on hand with an infant and a home to handle. So I let it be. Then a funny thing happened. When Samvit was about 6 months I noticed a small fringe around my hairline. It was new hair spurting up. How funny? But its real. And that began growing. But well, it did not stop at that. It went on. Layers and layers of new hair. Now, beat this, I still have layers growing even now. It's probably the fifth layer now. Hahahhah! And considering I have hopelessly frizzy, wavy hair it makes it seem to onlookers like I dont comb my hair in what seems like an eon!!! Ive been trying everything - new hair styles, clips, bands.. you name it. Nothing is helping. Well ya, its a good thing its growing back, but I look like a fuzzy, unkempt, lazy mom - which sadly, I am not!!!
Did this happen to any of you out there??
This blog was started with the idea of having a common forum where we mothers could blog and share our views/thoughts and experiences. The authors not restricted to CMS/EMS - MCC batch of 2001, hence thought would introduce Prianca Bhatia Aswal to you guys and invite her to start blogging with us.
Pria is from Delhi - Noida to be specific; and as an adorable son named Shaurya Singh Aswal (shaurya is just 2 days older than Kyra). Both Deepak (her husband) and she wanted a very Rajasthan Royal name - hence the singh. Where did I meet her --- thats the crazy part, we havent met each other till date. Became friends with her thru www.babycentre.in - we shared the same EOD for a babies. Became real close buddies right thru our pregnancies, sharing concerns about our yet to be born children to bitching about various things and sharing stories about fights with hubby dearest to making up with hubby ideas. Just about everything!!!!
The authors so far are all my class mates from college. And yes before you ask....I actually did graduate!!!!
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Just in case you are wondering what significance the number 13 has with our blog....I was just jotting down the number of mothers in our batch, and I counted 13. Thought would be good to put up a list of the names and details of their offspring's as per my knowledge.
Ramya - son (Anish)
Heena - Son (Krish)
Trisha - Son (Vivaan)
Anitha - Son (Shreyas)
Deepti - Son (Samvit)
Sathya - Son (Ayush)
Liz - Son (Jaiden)
Vijay - Son (Krish)
Yesra - Sons (????)
Shruti - Son (Tejas)
Sohini - Daughter (Avantika)
Smitha - Daughter (Nainika)
Pallavi - Daughter (Mihika)
And me - daughter (Kyra)
Sorry if I have forgotten anybody or if I have made spelling and other mistakes.
Do let me and the rest of us know, the correct details.
On a separate note when the idea of the blog was started the forum was to be open to other mothers, not necessarily from our batch or even our college - is that still open? Wanted to invite a good friend of mine to this blog - she is from Delhi and has an adorable son who is 2 days older than Kyra.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
The stories are based on 4 women.. who are roomies.. of which there is a mother and a daughter and 2 friends. There is Dorothy (the tall intelectual one), Sophia (dorothy's mother, the witty one), Rose( the really adorable but dumb one) and Blanche ( the sofisticated one.. who is trying to get as many dates as she can! ).
The reason I watch it is because , it reminds me of my college days having room mates and we had so much fun just talking and chit chatting together for hours and hours about the same topic or going on a tangent and ending up in a place nowhere close to where we started!!
But then we wern't wives or mothers.. but this show is about these women who WERE wives once and how their children have grown up and moved on and how they deal with their own lives in a funny way and you tend to relate to some of the characters in the show. And I realized that I was once roomies when I wasn't married, I am watching this show relating myself to the women in the show who have already gone through most of their life and I am actually going through life sharing my own life events through this BLOG! We women are not roomies.. but it is like we are the "Golden Girls" of the present age through the blog! hahahaaa!
It was a thought that suddenly ran through my mind and thought i'd share it with everyone! If anyone gets the time to watch one of the episodes.. you should!